Overload and low blood pressure

Just because I have not been posting recently does not mean I do not love you all :)

I have still been following you all on Reader, but I have not had time to actually write about what's been happening in my life recently. I've come home early today (Friday) and made time to write to you all!

Life has not been terribly exciting, there has just been lots of it.

I am teaching (creating) 4 papers. I am enrolled in 3 papers. Strike that, as of 2.30pm this afternoon, I am enrolled only in 2 papers. Why does it not feel like a relief? Instead I feel guilty, like I have let me tutor down :( Sigh. Move on. Can't do it all.

I have 2 freelance projects on the go, both websites. One is paid, one is done for love.

My husband and I officially started a freelance business venture together yesterday, when we got a domain name. It has now turned from ideas and conversations to "this is real".

I made plans for us to travel next August to a design conference I like to attend each year. This has been hard to plan because, well, see the next point...

The interwebs at work have only worked 2 out of 5 days this week. For-crying-out-loud-I'm-the-Goddamn-Web-Design-tutor!!!! W.T.F. Sob.

The step-kids have been going nuts. Mr 16 turned up unannounced this afternoon and gave me a heart attack when I walked in the front door to see the TV on full noise and him sitting on the couch eating my noodles. OK, that shouldn't startle anyone, but when you are having a low blood sugar, and it's NOT a kids weekend this sort of surprise is NOT OK. Miss 14 is being a whiny pain, and Mr 10 has decided to revert to the behaviour patterns of a very naughty 3 year old. Last weekend when they were here I got so fed up with the way they were treating us that I gave them a stern talk about treating us better next weekend, because we like to be around them, but not when they make our lives so shitty. I am NOT to be treated as hotel staff, and my house is not to be used as a backpackers! Grrr. (Small voice in my head reminds me that my mother always enjoyed the thought of me growing up and having teenagers of my* own to cope with, and now she has the sage advice "this too will pass") *I think this is part of the problem - they are not my teenagers, and I am feeling left out of the experience.

I am currently low, as you may have picked up from the previous paragraph-o-rama. 3.3mmol/L

I also have low blood pressure. Over the last 3 weeks Kind Nurse at my new GPs has measured my BP every Friday. It's never been above 110/60. Today it was a measly 90/60. GP has (jokingly, I'm sure?) told me that if the bottom number drops below 60 then that = death.

(As a side note: seems that the 24hr urine test I did last week has come back with acceptable numbers, just a request to check I don't have high blood pressure [duh], so that, at least, is some good news in the week. Means my kidneys are not failing as bad as the GP thought, but no doubt I will have to have an appointment with him to discuss in detail what those results mean. Hopefully I don't have to have another kidney biopsy. I have already decided that the only acceptable time for me to have anaesthesia will be during IVF! Well, one can try to make plans eh?)

It is now the weekend and I am behind in everything. I have 3 logos to design, 3 websites to create, 1 assignment due on my Diploma of Tertiary Teaching course, 2 presentations to make, dinner to conjure, house to clean, dishwasher to fix, garden to weed, washing to put in washing machine and push buttons beep beep wish-wash wish-wash...

Interview with a PhD candidate

My blog has made itself truly useful. A PhD-candidate student who is researching in the area of NZ Artifical Reproductive Technology policy contacted me and asked me to become part of her study.

She came today and did the interview, which I was delighted to be a part of. I mean, it's not everyday someone approaches you asking for your opinion on stuff, let alone something you're passionate about! And, it's studies like this that governments take notice of. So I'm hopeful.

The interview itself was about an hour long, and although she had a set of questions to ask me, the first one "tell your story" was incredible. Just to speak all those thoughts and feelings out aloud to someone who wasn't judgemental, who got it, and who seemed very interested in what I had to say was wonderful.

For me it was a cathartic experience. I just hope that my input is helpful. She (I won't reveal her name, since I haven't revealed mine that wouldn't be fair now would it?) mentioned that it's hard to find people in New Zealand going through IVF or other ARTs, because of the privacy laws. That's why my blog gets a pat on the head today :) Good blog, goooood blog. (Don't know why my blog has turned into a cat but it has.)

Blogging has allowed my voice to be heard, to be found, and hopefully to make a difference. I quite like that. :)