Saturday, August 7, 2010

I may have been quiet, but I haven't fallen off the map completely!

Yep, took a two week break from blogging, from thinking, from doing much at all except throwing myself into my new job - which I love by the way! I just want to let you all know that I'm ok, kind of. :P

Thank you to everyone for your kind thoughts and emails. It's helped more than you can know.

After getting the news that apparently we would not be eligible for publicly-funded IVF treatment we didn't know what to do at first. "Grieve" seemed to be the natural response. Then get bloody angry!

But then I remembered a New Zealand organisation called Fertility NZ. They offer advice, advocacy, education, information, and support for those New Zealanders affected by infertility. I had nowhere else to turn, so I wrote them an email. It's not everyday I spill my most private thoughts and fears to a stranger on the end of an email address, but I seriously felt like I was out of options.

Less than two hours later, a super-lovely woman who shall be called S emailed back asking for more information. I had to wait two days to get a lunch hour long enough, but I called her and we spoke for an hour. It was the best conversation - helped me to realise that I'm not crazy and what has happened to us is not right. Not right at all. (If you want the details, please read here and here.)

S advised us to get together a list of questions to put to the fertility clinic, to try and figure out this whole mess. So I've been doing that. And working a demanding new teaching job, and doing freelance web design work on top of all that. Trust me, my brain is full!

On the diabetes front, things have been interesting. Take a look at the last two weeks numbers:
Breakfast numbers under 10mmol/L. Woohoo!
Check out those breakfast numbers! Two whole weeks and only one result above 10mmol/L. I don't think that has ever happened to me in 22 years of blood testing! :) Woohoo! And why did it occur? Well, I have decided it's because I'm not stressed about my old job anymore. I can't believe that I stayed there, and actually did myself physical damage. Well, now I have proof - stress is bad for you. Duh. (Umm, yes, in case you were wondering, that is a smudge of blood in the top right corner. Eww)

From my desk at my new work, here's a 11.1mmol/L reading, next to my log book, which got all smeared with blood when I failed to notice my finger was bleeding. Oh yeah, and I was teaching a class at the time. So that was interesting: I had to stop and fossick around for a tissue! haha :P My students won't forget that class in a hurry!
I hate these stupid people on the cover.
So that's the rough guide to my last couple of weeks. Better blood sugars, stupid fertility clinic, and working to 10pm most nights to write 4x courses, so I can teach them the following day.

Oh, and I had an appointment with my diabetes nurse educator. You know, the one who always makes me cry. Well, surprisingly, it went very well. She saw my new numbers, my new insulin calculator on my iPhone, my new carb-ratios, and my new carb-counting and proclaimed me to be doing very well. Actual praise. Wow! :)


  1. Praise is good. Jiminy, I'm glad she found it in herself to offer it. :D And I wish I knew what your numbers meant, but I can tell by your excitement that they must be good.

    Keep up the good work. I'll keep you in my thoughts with this infertility hiccup. :) Hugs.

  2. Good job with the numbers and I'm glad that your nurse didn't make you cry!! I hope that you get all the answers you need from the clinic...I'll be thinking about ya and praying for you that you get the information you need and the whole mess clears up. :)

  3. That IS high praise from a Diabetes NE!! Yay for you Missy - that's fantastic control :) :) :)

    Also big yay for you on finding a support network who can help you find the answers/info that you need. Without sounding too trite, groups like that (I know I relied on the preeclampsia one big time) can make the difference to your sanity - and generally make the world a better place :)

    You are a busy girl aren't you? Wishing you a calm, lovely sugar'd week.

  4. Sounds like this woman is going to help? I hope...
    Glad the new job is going well. YAY, on those good BG numbers. I have been thinking baout you and hoping things were looking up!